January 30, 2004
I'm a Trained Conflict Resolution Expert.
So these two blokes I work with are really getting on eachother's nerves to the point that one or the other of them will probably wind up quitting if the situation is not remedied. One of them actually did quit earlier this week but my boss handled it with true aplomb and told him to take a day off and think about it.
So it works out that he's not quitting after all but is going to try to work from home as much as possible instead of coming to the office. It makes the situation a little less volatile but the fact is that at some point these two fellows are going to have to work together on the project as there are only 5 of us on the team, and everybody is all up in eachothers' junk a whole lot of the time.
Which is where I come in. As the "Project Manager" guy, the responsibility has fallen on me to keep these guys' avid dislike for each other from causing the project to suffer. The tricky bit is that I've never been the type to jump into the middle of a conflict. Nay, most of my life has been spent actively avoiding situations where somebody is yelling at somebody else or getting all heated over some irrational paranoia about so-and-so trying to make them look bad. Now it's my job. Hooray.
Fortunately for me, the investors that pay the bills around this office had the foresight to associate themselves with a very nice book-writer lady who has her own business specializing in conflict resolution and team psychology and all kinds of other Oprah-tastic stuff that lends itself well to hardcover books with photographs of the author on the cover, with a sport coat thrown casually over a shoulder and a look of self-assured benevolence on their face.
It is to her credit that during our conversation on the telephone, none of the books she recommended to me were written by her, and she didn't even mention to me that she had written such a book. At any rate, she is so very nice and calming and reassuring, it was very helpful to me to talk to her about the situation and get her input on what my responsibilities are in this situation. I was only mildly put off by the fact that most of the advice she had for me was given in the form of pithy little axioms that seem to be the little blades that make up her little psychological swiss-army knife. I suppose it's to be expected that somebody who has that much experience in the field would have as many ready-to-wear answers for the situation, and that is exactly why I wanted to talk to her, since I had none.
Posted by Josh at January 30, 2004 06:04 PM